U, Me aur Hum
April 21, 2008 § 2 Comments
U is the girl
Me is the guy (only a name…its not “me”…really!)
and Hum is the inner voice of Me (some may call it schizophrenia…)
U & Me are walking down the promenade at Hussainsagar…
A dialogue between U, Me and Hum
U – you know something?
Me – No I don’t know. I don’t know anybody called something!!(smiles, thinks he’s made a brilliant pj)
Hum – (dozing)
U – pj… (smiles) But I want to say something
Hum – (stirring from sleep…senses something amiss)
Me – (mind is occupied with other things…like chicken tandoori for dinner) yummm…I mean Hmm, go on..
U – You know, I like you more than anybody else…more than anybody I know…will know…argh, whats the use in hiding it anymore, u know it, I Love You!!
Hum – (is fully awake now and stunned) – arrrghhh, gah, what the hell happened here? Did hell freeze over when I was sleeping? This is why I don’t leave u alone Me, look what you’ve got yourself into!! Gahh! (bangs head against the inside of Me’s head)
Me – (has frozen, has no expression on his face) – huh
U – Whats happened to you? Are you surprised? And why is your eye twitching? Are you alright?
Me – gwee (regains use vocal cords) yes i’m alright(wipes sweat off face) I mean there is a dull ache inside my head, like somebody is slamming something inside it.
Hum – (stops banging head) Its me you idiot, and I’m banging my head in here, not slamming!!! O god, who am I stuck with?
U – O dearie, whats wrong? A teensie weensie headache bothering you, shall I massage your forehead?
Hum – Tell her its your neck thats hurting…tell her to wring it…
Me – Its my neck…er..I mean…what did you just say? Was it what I thought it was? (please say no)
Hum – Thats an invitation for trouble…Seriously dude, do you even listen to me when I talk to you?
U – Obviously it is, (looks into Me’s eyes, with all the innocence she can muster, plus a touch of moistness in the eyes) I’ve never felt this way before…I am sure…I love you!!
Hum – (cries) Well, looks like my days are numbered here. Now he’ll only be able to hear her voice in his head..I shall perish!! (cries some more)
Me – (carried away by emotions) [to hum : shut up man, look at her, so beautiful, so innocent and she says she loves me! Am I lucky or what? ]
Hum – As lucky as a lamb to slaughter. Look Me, think of your life, think of what you’ll be leaving…your friends, think of your family, if nothing think of the girl, for gods sake!!
Me – [ Yes, I should be more pragmatic. I shd try and steer this sticky topic away.. ]
Hum – [Yes. Yes. Excellent (grins) Now repeat after me : “Don’t you think its too soon. Maybe you should think it over..” Give it a serious air okay]
Me to U : Don’t you think its too soon. Maybe you should think it over.. (serious face)
Hum : [I is proud of you boy]
U : (tears well up in eyes) Is that what you think? I never (voice breaks) never thought you’d think like this. (looks at Me with sad expression) Do I mean nothing to you? (sob)
Hum : [Crap, don’t fall for those Me! Those tears aren’t real]
Me : (moves closer to U, wipes her tears)
Hum : Damn, lost him! (Walks off into dark corner of Me’s brain)
Me : Of course not. I feel the same way too! You mean a lot to me. I love you too! (a chill runs up his spine)
U : (smiles) I knew you’d feel the same too!! I knew u loved me too! (grins) Oh god, look at the time, my parents must be waiting for me! Bye love!
Me : Okay, go on. Bye to you too….(dreamily) Love!! (smiles)
In a dark corner of Me’s brain…Hum is bawling his eyes out. This relationship means a limited existence for him…atleast till this one is over…he still has his hopes…till he returns, stronger. He waits, patient, for his precious, his Me.
Far away from Me and Hum, hUm (U’s inner voice) is smiling, revelling in the success of her protege…
hUm : [Well done U. You have learnt well]
U : [Thank u, hUm. But this was way too easy!!] (Smiles and heads off to home)